What I’m Thankful For.

Well kids, it’s that time of the year again. The time when you’re surrounded by family members you don’t really know/like to eat way too much turkey and pumpkin pie all in the name of pilgrims and indians.
In the spirit of the ole’ tradition of counting the blessings, I give you a list of various goods and nonsense I am thankful for this year…

1.Peppermint Joe Joes, or as I call them, crack. Brought to you by Trader Joes, these delectable cookies are life changing. Go make the purchase and see how quickly you go through a box, or two.

2. Herman Cain. God bless him and his 999 plan for changing Amurrica one Godfather Pizza at a time. While he has had several unsuccessful runs for public office in the past, this go around has already proved to be more interesting, cue the sexual harassment allegations of recent. I also love the title of his recent bio, written but not written by him, cleverly titled This Is Herman Cain – original. How very Republican of him.
3. The fact that I am not a Penn State graduate.
4. Funny women who write funny books. Both Tina Fey (Bossypants) and Mindy Kaling (Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?) have written pee-in-your-skirt funny books that are basically impossible to put down. I mean, it’s not every year that two successful and highly hilarious women in Tinseltown contribute such greatness to the world of literature. So buy em, read em, and then pass em on to your best girl or gay to read so you can laugh together.
5. Living in the South. I love that I don’t need a massive winter coat just yet, and it’s November. I love that although I drink unsweet tea I know that I can order sweet tea anywhere I go, including that tiny Thai place off Franklin. I love that people you have never met wave and smile, typically in a non-creepy way, and I love that the majority of the population have enough of an accent to be adorable. Also, Southern gentlemen and the SEC. You are welcome.
6. No more Oprah’s Favorite Things. Now before you lose your S on me and tell me I’m un-American, hear me out. I have always liked Oprah as much as the next girl, but admit it, she had gotten a little ridiculous – “You get a car! And you get a car!” Seriously, people? So yes, I’m sorry that I’m not sorry for being thankful that Oprah is no longer telling us what we should want but can never afford.
7. Bronzer. It’s crucial for the winter months to ensure you don’t look like you just got back from spending months in a Siberian basement.
8. “Dancing With the Stars” and “The Sing-off” are almost over. Happy trails to Nancy Grace in sequins and Nick Lachey in his Express for Men iridescent shirt. See you never!
9. For the good fortune of not getting a single ticket for car tags that expired sometime in April. In my defense I’ve been really busy, and yes, I’m on it.
10. 903 Coral and other people that I love. I am so blessed to have such amazing friends who are so fun and think I’m fun, somehow appreciating my particular brand of ridiculous. To my hilarious roommates who I would be so boring without, thank you for loving me and uh, embracing my uh, idiosyncrasies as a roommate. You are two in a million. To all the other amazing people in my life who are way cooler than me, thank you for keeping my life so interesting and full of love. Now see, wasn’t that sweet?

So put your thanksgiving pants on and get ready to embrace the holiday. And don’t hold back on the stuffing and watching football all day on the couch – shopping on Black Friday will serve as your cardio.


martha marcy may marlene.

So I saw a movie this past weekend that quite honestly f’ed me up a bit. Translation: I loved it. You’ve got to go see it. Sure, I’ve had a couple nightmares since and yes, I freaked out a bit last night when I returned home to the back door wide open (thank you wind), but the film is incredible. And don’t worry, the plot is easier to follow than it is to say the actual title five times fast.

“Martha Marcy May Marlene” tells the story of a naturally gorgeous twenty something who suffers from anxiety and extreme paranoia after fleeing from an abusive cult. To say she has major issues is an understatement – she was brainwashed, after all, and struggles with separating delusion from reality. Her sister, Lucy, and her husband with an accent take her in, trying desperately to help her be “normal” despite her awkward and sometimes violent behavior. Flashbacks tell the horror of what she escaped, nitty gritty and all, but even those seem to morph with the present in such a seamless way that you find yourself unsure of what is really going on with Marcy May.

Now here’s the biggest shock of all…Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen’s little sister, Elizabeth, gives a stellar performance as Marcy May. That’s right, someone in the Olsen family has the ability to wear real clothes and show emotion. I bet it’s weird for Mary Kate & Ashley having a sister with actual talent. You feel? Eh, well for the first time an Olsen might just win herself an Oscar.

All in all, it’s a disturbing and haunting film that leaves you with an ache in the pit of your stomach and an overwhelming sense that you just witnessed something great. Sure, it’s a little unnerving and no, there’s no cookie cutter resolution, but it is definitely worth the $7.50. And for those of you who need further justification, Entertainment Weekly gave it a B+, which is basically an A+ in my book.

Grab someone nice and go see it.

to the old country!

You never know how a wedding will go. Sure, you’re honored and excited when one of your best friends asks you to stand beside her when she says “I Do” but you honestly never know how it will all pan out. Will you like your dress? Will she lose her S hours before the ceremony and have you putting together additional flower arrangements? Will you get along with all the bridesmaids, sans power struggle? Will you feel okay about latching arms with the chosen groomsman? So many variables to consider.

This past weekend I was in my lovely friend Beth’s wedding. She and I have been at bff status since college, we immediately bonded from preacher’s kid syndrome and general sarcascm, so I was very excited to stand on that top step beside her as she made it official with Mr. Chandler. Unlike most weddings, where the bridesmaids are more like hired hands to finish up all last minute details while wearing David’s Bridal, this was all about spending time with each other, see also: laughing and generally having fun. Shocking, right?! We did all the typical pre-wedding bridesmaid activites; i.e. getting the nails did, bridal brunch hosted by her mom, painting pottery for the newleyweds while eating cake in the shape of a corset, and semi-embarrassing the bride with plenty of questionable lingerie. Past that, there was a lot of story telling and laughing until it literally hurt – a sign of good friends having the best time together.

Now I know what you’re thinking – sure, you had an excellent time with errybody else but where was the Bride? She was right there with us. Drinking the OJ and dancing to low-quality rap videoes minutes before walking down the aisle. So when the time came and that instrumental medly played, I walked down the aisle with the Ginger and smiled as I stood on my blue dot waiting for Bethany to walk down, too. She was beautiful. Chase cried, she cried, we all cried. Weddings get me every time. After the ceremony and all the pictures and all the little southern ladies saying “you’re next” (mmmm excuse me what?!) and 2, ok 3 pieces of cake, they were off! Riding into the sunset. It’s a bittersweet feeling, watching one of your best girl friends leave with her HUSBAND. Happy that she’s happy, a little teary-eyed that she’s all grown up and someone’s wife.

Great weekend, great friends, lots of laughing, and lots and lots of love.

Now…I need a nap.